A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:24
How do you find a good Christian friend? This was a question that was recently put into the question box. It's a good question. With things like social media, it is possible to have many friends, but to have a real and meaningful friendship is something which is more difficult. It is an issue that many Christians can feel isolated and can be very lonely. So what can you do?
Proverbs 18:24 gives us some very helpful advice. A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly. The writer in Proverbs makes it clear that friendships require work and effort. They're not something which comes passively. So, if you want to have friends, you need to be friendly. If you hold yourself back, don't engage with people, remain aloof, then it's unlikely that people will be inclined to be friendly. Trying to talk to people, showing interest in them, spending time with them, putting yourself out to help them. All these things can help to foster and develop friendship.
- Thinking about where you might find friends. Think about people in the church. Start there. Try to engage. Spend time with people. Keep in contact during the week.
- There may be a Christian Union at your school or workplace.
- You might be able to join in with other Christians at other churches, Christian conferences, camps, holidays or even missions ( e.g. UBM or OAM Beach Teams).
You will discover that there are people in similar situations to you who may be desperate to have a friend as well. Proverbs 18:24, doesn't end there, because we are reminded at the end of that verse that there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother. We have in the Lord Jesus Christ the ultimate friend. He is the friend who will never desert. He is the friend who will never let us down. He is the friend who will always remain faithful. The lovely hymn "What a Friend We Have in Jesus" reminds us that we have one that we can turn to in every situation.
Finding friends, establishing friendships, these are things that you can take to the Lord in prayer. These are things that you can pray to God about, and God cares for his people and for their needs. It is the Lord's design for his people that they shouldn't be on their own. They shouldn't be progressing through this life without help, strength and encouragement from others, and so he's provided his church. A church made up of people who've been saved, brought together for the mutual benefit and blessing of one another.
